Fun Weekend

North Carolina spring, how I've missed you!!

It was such a tranquil evening at the Duke Gardens. We had to experience our first round of spring flowers. We'll be back soon for the tulips, dogwoods and wisteria.

Lia was shrieking and talking to the ducks in the pond down below

Little faces

Balloons and soccer balls- all that is needed to make a 1.5 & 3.5 year olds' weekend!

Somehow the statement, "Don't pick the flowers" didn't seem to apply to Lia.

Happy 18 month-old dance party!!

Things heard around our house these days:

Grace- "Balotional" (devotional); "George and the Washing" (George Washington, on Presidents' Day); "Can I cut my heart out now?" (referencing cutting out hearts for "Balenstines Day"); "Mom, I'm going to knock your socks off!"; Tuesday morning "Is it still Monday?" (hoping so so that she can go to gymnastics again); After church one Sunday, Dan asked Grace what her Sunday school teacher's name was. Her response, "I don't know...........Its probably Jesus."; "Why?" to EVERYTHING!!; "Fenuary" (February); Christmas songs, specifically O Come all Ye Faithful and Away in a Manger, still being sung in 'Fenuary'; Miss Matter-of-Fact's response after being told she did something good: "Yea... so I......"

Lia- "coewee" (color); "cowee" (favorite cow stuffed animal); "owie" (ouch, but she says it just for fun); "Bah-ter" (Baxter); "taitew" (thank you); "Wee-wee-wee..." (when she wants you to pick her up and swing her or help to do anything fun- riding the tricycle or scooter, etc...); "booKAH!" (book); "cheeee" (anytime she sees the camera); "butabutabuta..." (just cute mutterings with the cutest munchkin face); "biper" (diaper); "bew" (booo!); "no" (nose); "sheeww..." (shoe); "NiiiNiii" (night-night); "jaaaaacket" (always spoken in sing-song); "Ila ewe" (I love you).

Winter Girls

Grace is such a good big sister. Not always perfect, but she does do a pretty good job of sharing with Lia. And she always tries to cheer her up when she's crying by bringing a toy or singing a song. I love it when Grace does funny stuff to make Lia laugh on the way home from school. Their chorus of giggles is possibly the best sound I've ever heard ;-)

Kid Sister

Bratticus the Dog.
I thought the girls' couch was awfully hairy for having just brought it home a day ago. Sure, they might drag some dog hair from the floor up on to the couch but this was A LOT. Walking by, there was my answer. I was about to shoo Baxter off but decided a picture would be worth it for evidence's sake.

"Big sister, you're so cool! When I hear a beat, I cannot help but to shake my bootie!!"

Football Fans!!

Deep thoughts for the night... Its coming up on being a year since the beginning of this stressful period in our lives. It is over now, and well before the 1 year mark. I guess its just when I think back to this time a year ago, we had no idea what was looming, what was probably already in the works at this point. We had a good groove with our life and I was enjoying staying home with the girls and Dan was about to finish up his season. When I think about Texas, my heart aches. That really confuses me because I spent a lot of time missing North Carolina while we were there. Now we're back in NC, I'm so confused!!! Maybe it is in the abruptness that we left that leaves me feeling kind of robbed. There was so much I still wanted to see and do. Or maybe the disbelief that it was really real. I set out to make Texas home since that was where we went and I was determined to like it there. We kind of struck out in that regard in San Antonio. But Austin... it was my kind of city in so many ways. Yes, the summers were a bit toasty but I survived 2 Texas summers while being pregnant and did not birth a hard boiled egg (hehehe). So long as you had a pool, it was alright!
Life is strange. Thoughts and emotions are strange too. I have found myself almost wishing (since we're pretty much back to 'normal') to be in a tough situation again because the revelations about God were so beautiful and real. We had to be completely dependent on Him. Christian songs I've always liked took on a new meaning, and as many sing about, I finally realized what it feels like to fall in love with God. And to be able to be wrapped up in thinking about God and things related every day during the week, not just on Sundays at church and for part of the drive home.
We are forever developing as individuals. Both through good experiences and bad. Both kinds are ultimately good, I believe. As long as you are willing to keep it in perspective of the greater picture and how this life is a flash compared to our eternity in heaven. This life is not our destination but a time we live on earth before heaven. My favorite word will forever be surrender. If we could all have a lesson on surrendering our control and worries, we could be happier. Dan and I had that lesson, more like we were shoved down in a seat and the lesson was forced upon us. But it was in our reception of that lesson that we grew. I really learned that no matter how much you plan, how much you think things should go in a certain order, it doesn't matter. You spend months planning something, sitting there one day feeling on top of the world, then in a flash a phone call changes everything. Every possible variable is up in the air. You try to plan in one aspect of your life, but there's no point b/c the area you have no control over has not yet revealed itself. Surrender your plans to God because if you present your plans to Him, he's probably just laughing anyways, right? ;-)
When these rough patches come along, it always blows my mind to think that God has known since the beginning that it was going to happen that way. And bad things don't happen because He's a 'mean God'. Its all about the perspective that this life is just for a second in the big scope of eternity and the goal of these hard spots is to refine and strengthen us.

reflection

The vast majority of 2011 was filled with uncertainty and stress. Due to a set of circumstances, much was taken from us, unexpectedly. Some of you may know what I am talking about, but regardless, the more important fact is to talk about how much more was gained from the same circumstances. Thanks to the above mentioned deal, we got to return to North Carolina. When we left, I never thought we'd ever come back. I got to baptize my own husband back at the church we loved with our favorite pastor. I get to work at UNC again. We are back with our very closest friends. The girls go to a great school- one that I had considered before we moved away. We have the beautiful fall colors, a 'real' winter and the gorgeous spring flowers again. Dan has a great job at a place I thought he should work at before we moved away. He helped many a friend get a job there but was looking for coaching for himself. Life is funny how it works. More than anything, I love the newfound contentment that (maybe) I was forced to find. To learn how to live where you don't even look at money or 'things' and buy the bare minimum at the grocery to nourish yourself. Ok, so raspberries weren't the bare minimum, but it was the summer!! I used to be a professional window shopper, browsing for hours. I wanted something, didn't know what, but knew I didn't want to spend more than $20 dollars. I'd finally settle on something that struck my fancy and all the good that did was leave me wanting more. Now I just don't go looking and then I don't have to want. That's what works when there is no extra $$. Then all fun and satisfaction is found in family time together doing something simple that likely costs nothing. Sometimes the simplest outtings, especially ones that were not planned, were the most fun. Just relishing in the joy of hearing two little girls giggling together in the back seat of the car- we felt rich.
To be so grateful just to have a job to go to everyday. Granted I was able to have a year at home with the girls (which I treasured) it has been nice to be given the perspective of being glad to have a job everyday. Dan, too. To hear people with a sour attitude at work- PEOPLE! be glad you are employed!
I am now reading my bible every day. This is something I have wanted to make happen for years and I truly watched a wall stop me from doing so last January. I had no excuse, I just wasn't going to do it. Why?! So stupid. It brings me joy to read a verse that I know because of one of the songs we sing at church. For many, it probably goes the other way- knowing the verse first, then hearing it in the song but it delights me, nonetheless.
My final thoughts for the year that confirmed all of the above. Christmas: my favorite moments of Christmas were at the Christmas Eve service and singing carols and listening to Grace sing along, surprising me by knowing the words to many of the songs and more than just the first verse. I found myself feeling a bit emotional there at the service, not wanting to leave the moment and that feeling of peace, contentment, and overwhelming joy. Maybe pride, too. I was so proud of my Graca and her sweet singing. Although I grew up believing in Santa and my girls are getting to now, I was just feeling bothered by all of the materialism that was about to come on with the giving of gifts and hearing all of the "I want..." from the kids. I guess I just knew for myself, I didn't want anything. Right there at that moment, there was nothing more I could have wanted (except for Lia to be feeling better so she and Dan could have been there too).
My other favorite moment was on Christmas day when Grace started singing her favorite Christmas song, Away in a Manager, in the middle of opening gifts. One by one people quieted down until everyone was listening to her sing. I thought surely she'd turn shy and stop, but she sang all of the verses of the song and again, I was so proud of her. Mimi and I got teary eyed and Grace asked Mimi, while wiping her eyes, "What's the matter, Mimi?"
Love my girls, my husband, our family and our friends. Those are the things that are what this current life is all about.